Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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