walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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