i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
ok first of all what the fuck
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
