Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
It's Friday. Sex?
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
