doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
my god I love twenty year old dicks
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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