She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
