it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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