Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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