Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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