also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
