so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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