How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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