Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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