why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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