Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
apparently the secret to your success is patron
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Randomize
