so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
