Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
