Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize