Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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