she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
