Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
