easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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