So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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