Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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