I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
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