He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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