Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
her vagine was all disorganized.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I would fuck him just for his dog
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
