yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
...so i touched it.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
