New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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