He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
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