: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
This is not my ceiling
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
