Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
