Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
You are the jesus of drinking
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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