Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize