we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
