You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
