i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
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