Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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