Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
