he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
