Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
