she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
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