yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Vodka?
Forever.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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