First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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