Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
