That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
