your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Randomize
