my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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