You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
