Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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